Hello Again...

Okay, so, it's been a WHILE since I last wrote.

I have taken some much needed time off from writing. I needed to step back from blogging on senseless things, or what I had felt had become senseless things and center my focus on me, and, most importantly, God.

Unfortunately, I have spent a lot of time and energy in continuing in my stubborn ways. Unable to relinquish control. That is something that I still need to work on.

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Anyways, I have struggled a lot the first part of this year, but have come out better.

I finally broke down and told my husband that I could no longer attend our old church. While it is a great church, it really was not the place for me. I always left it feeling like I was sincerely missing something, a sense of community. I felt like an outsider looking in. Now, whether this was my fault or the church's, we may never know, but one thing was clear, it simply wasn't the place for me.

The hubby and I did some looking around and found another church, a sister church, that seems to be a good fit. We have been attending for about a month now and have really felt God's word flow from the pastor and love from the youth minister when my oldest started having suicidal ideations again. (Yes, we are going back down that road, but we seem to have better support this time around. Or maybe I am just better prepared to handle it.) Now, I have joined the Women's ministry for Wednesday night service and I look forward to going to a Thursday night service that is going to open up very soon. I seem to be getting plugged in and I like feeling like there are people around me.

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Since Christmas, I have also been reading a book on Anger. As I have written before, I suffer from a lot of Anger. I want to learn how to conquer it because I can't keep living with it. It is damaging, not only my mental health, my patience, my parenting, but now my body seems to be suffering as well. So, there will be more on that later this week.

Also, this year, the hubby and I have both started making healthier food choices and even exercising. I am proud to announce that I have lost 10 lbs since January 2nd, but the hubby has lost a whopping 23 lbs!