Overnight Visitation...Ugh!

Source

Yesterday, we got the final visitation agreement in the mail. I am not looking forward the changes that are about to begin. My step-daughter is going to be starting overnight visitations with her mother within a month. This is going to be a big change for her. I think that she has only once attempted staying with Mom and she was too young and scared. My husband has full custody of his daughter and she has never spent the night anywhere but at his parent's house.

Now, she starts Kindergarten on Monday...big change #1. In a month, on my 1 year wedding anniversary (boy I just can't catch a break!), she starts overnight visitations with her mom....very big change. My step-daughter loves her mom and I know that all children need both of their parents (a privilege that my own daughter lacks), but I am still worried, none the less. How will this effect everyone? How will my little one handle going from only a few hours of visitation here and there to two nights away from us? How will this effect my older daughter who's father is not involved in her life at all? How much will it devastate my husband to have to send his little girl, the center of his world, away, even if it is with her mother?

I have tried doing some research on how to help the transition, but there is surprisingly little information out there, so what do I do? Up to now, my husband's ex and I have pretty well avoided each other. On very few occasions, I have had to pick up or drop my step-daughter off at visitation and we smile, but what is really underneath those smiles? I know on my side, it is curiosity, anger that she is truly my step-daughter's mom and I have to be in competition, concern for my step-daughter and the whole situation, and even jealousy. What does she think about me? Often I have dreamed of at least peacefully coexisting with her and even being some sort of limited friends, if only for my step-daughter's sake. But how would I do this and what if it all goes wrong?