Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Submission, Again.

Okay, so I am going to be one of those bloggers that I spoke of yesterday, see my post here.

Before I begin, though I do want to give fair warning. I am researching submission so that I can better figure out how to apply it to my life. I do not necessarily practice what I am preaching, yet, my goal is to research it and then apply it.

When I got married, whether I knew it or not, one of the promises I made was to submit to my hubby out of reverence to Christ. (Even though I specifically left “obey” out of our vows.)

I’m going to share a bit with you about what I have found submission should look like in marriage.

Submission, and respect (since they go hand in hand), can be seen in little everyday things. Submission means choosing NOT to nag. It’s choosing NOT to complain to your girlfriends, or anyone else who will listen. Submission will humbly and gently address a perceived problem with your hubby. (One of my Sunday School teachers says that nagging is requesting something or bringing something up more than three times.) But, most of all, submission is continuing to ask for God’s help in doing the above (not the nagging) over and over again.

We live in a society where everything is now, now, now and me, me, me. Submission means looking outside of yourself and your wants. Submission means considering things from your hubby’s point of view, even if his point of view is what you want to see. It means setting aside yourself and, out of respect for God and your hubby, choosing to submit to your husband’s direction.

By being respectful & submissive to our hubby’s we can actually empower them to lead our families. That doesn’t mean we just sweep our own struggles under the carpet. It means that we thoughtfully, prayerfully, and humbly approach our hubbies with our struggles and trust them to make the best decision that he can (or wait for God’s decision).

There will come times where major issues will weigh on your heart (i.e. whether or not to have more children, financial difficulties, etc.). Instead of trying to manipulate your hubby by nagging or bullying, the best thing that you can do is to pray about it. In wanting to submit to your hubby, you have to first surrender your heart to God, give Him your fears. Asked God to help you trust and respect your hubby and most of all, communicate humbly with your hubby.

This last part, I struggle with the most. In my marriage, I tend to bury things and when my hubby asks me what is wrong, I try to convince him and myself that everything is fine when it’s not. The biggest step for me, in submitting, would be to actually give him a respectful answer and humbly bring my problems to him.

Now, I would love to hear from you. What does submission look like in your marriage? What do you struggle the most with?

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